Today is moving day again. I feel like I’m always packing and unpacking and then packing again. I wonder if I’ll ever settle down again in one place for a long period of time. In the last seven years I’ve lived in Oak Bluff, Winnipeg, Culiacan, Irapuato, Guadalajara and now Mazatlan. Three different places in Guadalajara and now three different places in Mazatlan.
In addition to moving house, I’ve done a considerable amount of traveling back and forth to Canada, around Mexico and most recently to the Dominican Republic as well. Indeed my suitcases have become my best friends.
Not only are they my best friends but they also contain nearly all of my worldly possessions. My life is in these bags. They are filled with clothes and teaching materials and the odd small momento of my travels. This makes it easy to be transient.
I think of the places I’ve lived in the past seven years. I left my home and my heart in Oak Bluff. That was supposed to be the home where my husband and I would grow old together. Instead we divorced.
My apartment in Winnipeg never felt like home. It was just somewhere to sleep after going to school and volunteering during the daytime. It held no memories. Other return visits to Winnipeg for surgery found me living in a variety of different places as well. And the odd time I return for a visit I move from friend to friend to friend.
Here in Mexico I have few friends who actually stay in the same place year after year. It has its benefits. New areas to explore, new people to meet, and new adventures in abundance. But I must admit that a small part of me is beginning to yearn for a “home”. That’s a feeling I haven’t had in a long time. My heart has never yet zeroed in on that one place where I would like to settle down.