Yesterday one of my friends here in Mexico asked me why I hadn’t changed my surname now that I am divorced. And of course this got me thinking………….
When I got married I eagerly changed my surname “Pollack” to that of my husband “Hendin”. Then, when the marriage ended, I rather impulsively began using my maiden name again. However I have yet to legally change it.
Why? There are two very simple reasons. One is the financial cost and the hassle associated with this. Credit cards, bank accounts, investments, health insurance, passports, driver’s license, etc. But the more important reason is that for some forty odd years I have been known by my married name. That has been my identity. Professionally this has been my name. And I also firmly believe it’s the person that counts. It doesn’t matter what name I use. I am ME!
Back in the 70’s when I married, hyphenating the maiden name with the married name was common although it is today. And now many women choose to keep their maiden name rather than change it to the married name. It seems that the idea of changing a maiden name to the husband’s name has gone by the wayside along with the idea that marriage is forever, as supported by the high divorce rate in North America.
My daughter is about to marry a man with a hyphenated surname. When I asked her what she intended to do, I was informed that the jury is still out on that one. It is still in discussion.
As for me, should I ever decide to remarry, changing my name again will only happen if my husband and I are to use a completely new name, one very different from either of the names we have used in the past. And that is the only circumstance under which I will ever change my name again!