Tag Archives: families

You’re Never There

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You’re Never There

I disagree. I can’t say I’m never there, but I definitely can say that I’m seldom there. And just where is there? Why, it’s Facebook of course!

Just why am I seldom there? Because life is to be lived. That means up front and personal. That means interacting with other people. It doesn’t mean staring at a screen on my phone or on my laptop all day. That isn’t living.

Basically, I share my WordPress blog on Facebook. I belong to three writers groups on Facebook which I don’t always check out as often as I would like to. I’ve learned a lot about writing and publishing from these groups. As I’ve said many times before, send me a private message if you want me to be aware of something important going on in your life. With hundreds of friends on Facebook, I don’t have time to waste scrolling and sifting through far too many shared posts every day to find the ones that may truly be worth reading.

Occasionally I read posts on Facebook from a group called If You Grew Up In Winnipeg. There are two types of people who post here…those who still live there and haven’t experienced life outside of Winnipeg and those that have escaped Winnipeg when they have discovered the adventures that can be found elsewhere. However I must admit that I do find some of the photos quite interesting.

I had a stimulating conversation with a friend in Winnipeg last night. We’re both divorced, have adult children and grandchildren. We both concluded that our lives have not turned out the way we envisioned them years ago. But we do find our lives challenging as well as fulfilling.

And I wholeheartedly continue to embrace this philosophy…………………. First Coffee, Now What?

And you?

Hug Your Kids Tight

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Hug Your Kids Tight

Last week a horrendous event occurred here in the Wenatchee Valley. It wasn’t an accident. It was cold-blooded murder. While I don’t personally know the family involved, I can’t help but feel overwhelmed by this senseless tragedy. Actually a myriad of feelings fill my head. Frustration that an amber alert hadn’t been called immediately when a distraught mother reported that her ex-husband hadn’t returned her three daughters after a custodial visit. Anger that the father had done the unimaginable. He had murdered his three daughters. Compassion for the mother deprived of the opportunity to watch her children grow up, sharing in their joys and sorrows. And fear because this dangerous man is still at large.

While today more than ever people are encouraged to seek professional help when mental health issues arise, they are often reluctant to do so. Sadly sometimes the resources are not always readily available. There is also the danger of a misdiagnosis and inappropriate treatment. The system definitely has its flaws.

Wild speculations about the circumstances that led to this horrific event fill Facebook, fueled by the fact that the father was a veteran who had served in the military. This isn’t a time for Facebook gossip. This isn’t an internet soap opera. This is real life involving real people.

Instead, this is a time for prayer; for the mother, the three little angels now in heaven, and even the father.

Whirlwind Weekend

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Whirlwind Weekend

I had an amazing weekend with my family in Culiacan. It’s almost a year since I last saw them and I’m determined to see them one more time this winter before I head back to Washington. I hadn’t realized just how large a country Mexico is until I started doing some serious traveling. And Aguascalientes is twelve hours away from Culiacan.

The whole family picked me up at the bus station Saturday morning bright and early. We were all excited to see each other and I marveled at how much the kids had grown since I last saw them. How can they possibly have grown so big? Juan Carlos is 14, Jose Agustin is 11, Angel is 9 and Christien is 4.

We drove out to La Limita Restaurante for breakfast. The food was wonderful and we had a fabulous time visiting and catching up. And of course this abuelita was overwhelmed by all her nietos vying for her attention. Life doesn’t get any better than this.

After breakfast we went to the mall for a while. After a short break at home we were off to a park to watch Juan play basketball. We came home for dinner and this was followed by a most interesting game of Super Mario Monopoly (in Spanish). Most unusual rules in this game and I’m not quite sure that I even now understand them.

On Sunday we went to the mass at church and one of my grandsons did a reading. We came home for lunch and then we were off to another basketball game. This was held at Universidad Autonoma De Sinaloa and was an all-star game. This was the most exciting basketball game I’ve ever seen in my life and the tie-breaker came with a sensational shot with a mere three seconds left in the game.

After the game we came home for a very late dinner. Then the boys were off to bed early as they leave for school at 6:30 am. Classes start at 7. This abuelita was still asleep and didn’t hear them leave the next morning.

We did spend time together when they came home from school. After dinner Juan took me back to the bus station on his way to another basketball game. Somehow it was Monday night and I was heading back to Aguascalientes.

Lucila is pregnant and I’m expecting grandson number five in January. I predict another whirlwind weekend in Culiacan in a couple of months.

Trapped or Ministry

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Trapped or Ministry

Last Sunday Pastor Mike began a new series called Trapped. It was enlightening and definitely merited more introspection. So naturally Steve and I got into a discussion about the traps in our lives, and if they really were traps. We concluded that what often appears to be a trap can instead result in the opportunity to become a ministry.

I’m a firm believer that people come into our lives for a reason. And I also feel that I have ventured down a path that was predestined for me, although I do find myself occasionally straying off to the side. I always have been a bit of a rebel. It’s a lot to ponder. Why do I live where I live? Why do I do what I do? Is it a trap that has turned into a ministry? Can it fluctuate between the two? Dare I stray further?”

I often wonder what keeps drawing me back to Washington instead of snowbirding back to Canada. There can only be one answer to that. If you’re a believer you’ll get it. And if you are not a believer there’s no way you’ll understand it. The same holds true for why I have chosen to return to Aguascalientes during the winter months.

While it’s still a nomadic lifestyle it now has a twist. I’ve been coming to Washington since 2016 and to Aguascalientes since 2019. Before that, at the three or four year mark I’d move on. But now I’ve more or less settled in two places….Washington state and Aguascalientes.

The wanderlust has waned. I don’t get quite as excited about traveling and exploring new places. But on the same token I’m not prepared to call only one place “home” just yet. It’s actually kind of fun having more than one home although it can be a challenge when dealing with Immigration in three countries.

But what makes a home a home are the people. And I’ve been blessed with many amazing people in my life whom I consider to be much more than just friends. They’re my family. And I tell them they’re stuck with me now. Apparently they don’t mind and feel the same way. I can’t tell you how great it is to have family in three countries…my native country and the two countries I now live in. It really resonated when I found myself seeking asylum in two foreign countries during Covid. And although things have calmed down considerably, my appreciation for my extended family grows more every single day.

When life throws a curve ball my way, my attitude determines the perspective. Is it a truly a trap? Or is it an opportunity for a ministry?

Time to lighten things up. We’re headed out to see My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3.

Happy Fourth!

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Happy Fourth!

Fourth of July. Independence Day. And I have memories of this day going back decades. When I lived in Winnipeg we’d often drive down to Grand Forks or Fargo to see the fireworks. Back in 2011 I was in Minneapolis with Carole. We went to a band concert out at Lake Minnetonka and watched the fireworks. We also went to a parade in St. Louis Park. When I lived in Leavenworth I’d walk downtown and watch the kids enjoying Kinderfest. But here in East Wenatchee I’m having a lazy day so far. Supposedly fireworks are prohibited in Douglas County, but I’m sure they’ll light up the sky tonight anyways. Washingtonians are like that.

Actually there’s another reason why I’m having a lazy day today. I’m still drained from yesterday. I finally booked my flights to Winnipeg and that is an ordeal I always dread. It may be easy to get to Mexico from Sea-Tac but it sure isn’t easy getting to Winnipeg. I lucked out. I’m actually going to do this within 24 hours. I leave Wenatchee at 7 am and get into Winnipeg at 1:39 am the next day. One shuttle to Sea-Tac and two flights. Drawback is I have to go through Customs in Vancouver, an airport I detest. And I’m also flying Air Canada, an airline I’m not fond of. But Alaska still doesn’t fly to Winnipeg.

But this year I’m determined to get back to Winnipeg although I was there last summer. I have an opportunity to be with both of my kids together for the first time in eight years and I can’t pass that up. As an added bonus my granddaughter will be there too. Somehow when you’re in your seventies and you don’t live in the same country as your kids, it feels a lot different than when you were in your fifties and did that. So when I heard that my daughter was flying in from Kelowna, I knew I had to make this trip. It might be the last time we’re all together again. I’m far from being a pessimist but I look at things very differently than I did when I was younger. And if my kids are reading this and rolling their eyes, there’s no need to panic. I’m not dying of any terminal illness that I know of. I’m just looking forward to us all being together.

On a very different note, we went to see the new Indiana Jones movie on the weekend. I loved it! Okay, the storyline was a little weak and predictable. But the special effects and the stunts were amazing! For a couple of hours there I was totally engrossed and forgot all about the hassle of booking flights and shuttles. I encourage everyone to go and see this movie. You won’t be disappointed. Indiana Jones also brought back memories of seeing a live show at MGM in Orlando decades ago when my kids were little. And I wonder if they remember it.

Happy Fourth of July!

Mother’s Day Moments

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Mother’s Day Moments

I’ve come full circle when it comes to celebrating Mother’s Day—as a child, as a mother and as a grandmother. There are some special moments I recall in every phase. I’ll begin with childhood.

At school we always made Mother’s Day cards. At home I would also make my own cards as well. My dad always encouraged us to make this day a special one for my mom. Growing up like that I thought that was the norm; that was what all families did. It wasn’t until I got married that I found out that not all families were like that.

My first Mother’s Day as a married woman I was told by my ex that I wasn’t his mother so there was no reason to celebrate. Once we had kids that changed, mainly because my kids were into making that day a special one for me. They made cards and art projects at school, Cubs and Girl Guides. I still have a few of those tucked away.

As a grandmother, that means my daughter is a mother. Video calls with my daughter and granddaughter have to suffice as we live in different countries and have yet to be together on Mother’s Day.

The last time I saw both of my kids together on Mother’s Day was in 2007. My daughter was away in 2008 and in 2009 I was returning from a mission trip with my church. In 2010 I was already living in Mexico.

That first Mother’s Day in Mexico was interesting because May 10th is the day to celebrate regardless of what day of the week it falls on. None of this second Sunday in May. Mothers are truly honored. There is a lot more to it than just going out for brunch or dinner or giving your mother a card or a gift..

A few years ago I had this gut feeling that I wanted to go back to Winnipeg and see my son on Mother’s Day. And I’m glad I went with my gut. Thanks to Covid, I didn’t see my son again for four years (or maybe five years, depending on who you talk to.)

Many years have gone by since I hosted family gatherings for Mother’s Day. One of my grandmothers died when I was a young child, the other one died when my son was a year old and my mother died in 1996. I usually go to church on Mother’s Day and sometimes go out for brunch with friends after. I receive an annual text from my son and a call from my daughter. I wish I could travel back in time to when we were all together on Mother’s Day. If only I could relive even one moment. Those memories are now treasures in my heart.

I’m going to visit my mom today. No, I won’t be in Winnipeg and I won’t be going to the cemetery. But I do have photos I’ve taken when she was still alive. And I do have photos I’ve taken when I have been able to go to the cemetery. They’re all on my Seagate and I will spend some time with them this afternoon.

Happy Mother’s Day everyone! Enjoy your day!

New This Week

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New This Week

I joined the Wenatchee Valley Senior Activity Center. Now that I’m living in East Wenatchee, the Leavenworth Senior Center is just a little too far away. WVSAC is a much larger center with many more activities to choose from. Today I’m going to a writing group, staying for lunch and then will decide if I want to play cribbage in the afternoon. I’m also planning to going to Tai Chi and a book club.

I start teaching fitness classes again this week. I will be teaching mainly in East Wenatchee, although I will still be subbing in Leavenworth. Right now it looks like it will be three classes a week plus the subbing.

Back in Canada WestJet pilots have voted to strike as have the federal public servants. It figures. This is the year I need to get my passport renewed. And I watch from a distance as Trudope continues to dig himself in deeper and deeper.

I just started a course from Wesleyan University entitled Suicide Risk and Prevention. It’s interesting how the terminology has changed over the years. The rates are soaring, much of it being attributed to Covid. The ratio from a couple of decades ago was 4.5 men to 1.5 women. It’s now 4.5 men to 3.5 women. Very significant and very scary.

I had a video call with my granddaughter yesterday. Madeline told me she went camping on the weekend and slept in a tent. They cooked hot dogs and s’mores over a campfire. She also showed me her chocolate Easter bunnies that she hadn’t eaten yet. Madeline also insisted on showing me the medals her mom won in competitions. And of course she wanted me to see Tigger, one of the cats.

It’s warming up and 60s are in the forecast for the weekend. The snow has cooperated and stayed far away atop the mountains. No blizzards or tornados in Washington.

Have A Wonderful Wednesday!

Another Tragedy

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Another Tragedy

A week ago at this time, millions of us in the world had never even heard of Uvalde, Texas. Now we can’t get it out of our heads. The sad part is that the focus should be on the senseless killing of innocent children and teachers, of the injured including the shooter’s own grandmother. Instead it has become a political gong show about who is to blame. This makes the tragedy even worse.

Accounts detailing the shooter’s biography are chilling. A victim of bullying. A history of violence. A son of a drug addict. And most disturbing that he legally purchased two rifles prior to the shooting and posted photos on his Instagram account.

My kids attended a private elementary school back in the 80s in Canada. The school had a security system and the doors were always locked. Here we are decades later and Robb Elementary had a door left propped open. With the track record here in the USA regarding school shootings, a door propped open during school hours? Absolutely reprehensible!

The mother instinct is a strong one. How dare they handcuff a woman who in desperation was trying to protect her children! Other angry parents begged for the Kevlar vests that the police had because law enforcement merely sat back and didn’t do anything. Perhaps more mothers are needed on the police forces.

My heart goes out to the families of the victims. I can only imagine how helpless they felt while the shooting was going on and how horrific the grieving is now that it’s over. We need to pray not only for these families, but for all of America, a country in crisis.

People First NOT Politics First.

Thoughts

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I’m now in Culiacan. Gracias ETN for yet another smooth journey across this beautiful country.

I usually head to the USA at the end of April, not the beginning of March. But Covid threw everything out of whack. So the Jacaranda trees aren’t blooming yet.

Aguascalientes is home to me here in Mexico. My third time and it has really grown on me. I was here for the Ferria three years ago and will miss it this year. Covid affected that too. There was no celebration in 2020 or 2021.

I’m having a wonderful visit with my Mexican family. My grandsons have all shot up in height since I was here three months ago and the youngest turns three on Friday. I absolutely adore the curls!

My granddaughter in Kelowna turned four yesterday and we had a video call. She went swimming and then out for sushi. Today she’s having a party with her friends.

I spoke to my son in Winnipeg yesterday and was totally devastated to hear that he tested positive for Covid. He says he feels fine but I’m  thousands of miles away, feeling helpless and concerned. A peril of living in different countries than your kids.

And now Russia has invaded the Ukraine. Why can’t we live in peace?

A Christmas Memory

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A Christmas Memory

I’ve spent Christmas with a variety of different people in numerous places in Mexico and the USA. But one of my favorite memories dates back to the 90s, when I lived in Canada and my kids were still young and living at home. And Koal was still with us too.

My friend Lesley had invited us over on Christmas Eve. When I had a thyroidectomy, my vocal folds were nicked during surgery. Lesley was my speech therapist who worked with me to get my voice back, and we became good friends as the months went by. My kids were delighted to meet other kids at this Christmas Eve gathering, and it was a most enjoyable evening.

On Christmas Day I prepared my usual bacon and eggs breakfast, and then took my coffee into the living room where we opened presents. Of course Koal got the most gifts. That dog was spoiled rotten by all of us, and was always given way too many treats, toys and t-shirts to add to his wardrobe.

A lazy afternoon included card games and siestas, although I did spend a fair amount of time in the kitchen preparing a traditional turkey dinner.

After dinner we watched Christmas Vacation and laughed ourselves silly at the antics of Chevy Chase. I also remember the first time we saw that movie. We were in Phoenix, Arizona.

The last time I had Christmas dinner with my kids was in 2009. And I often wonder if we’ll ever do it again. We live in different countries. With the world crazy with Covid, nothing is certain anymore.

Now, more than ever before, it’s important to practice mindfulness. If you are fortunate to have family and good friends, celebrate with them NOW. A year from now, we may not all be around to get together. Nothing is promised.

Merry Christmas to all my readers and followers. May you and your families enjoy great times together, in good health, over this holiday season.